Friday, May 31, 2013

Lemon Juice is Good for Your Vagina



Vaginal Hygiene
Diluted lemon juice makes a safe and sane method of vaginal hygiene. Though it is a powerful antiseptic it is nevertheless free from irritating drugs in douches and suppositories.

Read more: http://www.trueactivist.com/45-uses-for-lemons-that-will-blow-your-socks-off/




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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Screen Outdoor Open Air Cinema Presents The Screen Naija One Village, One Cinema



Screen Outdoor Open Air Cinema with the cooperation and support of the Bank of Industry, Projection Foundation, Goethe Institut, DVWORX Studios, Nigerians Report, Eko International Film Festival and other partners is launching the Screen Naija One Village, One Cinema Project at the popular Freedom Park Lagos on Saturday June 22, 2013.
The event is open to the public from 4 pm - 9 pm and it is free.

Expected at the event are over 500 people; including the new brand ambassador of the Bank of Industry Afro hip hop super star Dapo Daniel Oyebanjo, popularly known as D'banj, Nollywood stars, movie buffs, entertainment celebrities and major stakeholders in the Nigerian film industry.

Screen Outdoor Open Air Cinema duly registered to operate outdoor cinema business in Nigeria will launch the Screen Naija One Village, One Cinema Project in every conducive and receptive safe community of all the local government areas (LGAs) in Nigeria starting from Lagos State to boost the Nigerian film industry.








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Saturday, May 18, 2013

Read NOLLYWOOD MIRROR(R) in the World's Most Advanced 7" Table



Yes. You can have an amazing display of the new NOLLYWOOD MIRROR® in the Kindle Fire HD Tablet, the world's most advanced 7" tablet and makes NOLLYWOOD MIRROR® the first Nigerian magazine to be delivered in this awesome mobile device that everyone who loves tablets is falling in love with.
Seeing is believing!







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Shop the Kindle Store for over 1.2 million of the most popular books, or explore millions of free, public domain books such as Pride and Prejudice.

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  • Over 23 million movies, TV shows, songs, magazines, books, audiobooks, and popular apps and games such as Facebook, Netflix, Twitter, HBO GO, Pandora, andAngry Birds Space
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  •  Prime Instant Video — unlimited, instant streaming of thousands of popular movies and TV shows
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  • NEW: Kindle Fire owners get 500 Amazon Coins (a $5 value) to spend on Kindle Fire apps and games. Learn more







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Beyoncé's Sister Solange Stole the Show On the 66th Cannes Red Carpet


Photo credit: Daily Mail UK.

Beyoncé's sister Solange Knowles stole the show on the red carpet Wednesday night of the 66th Cannes Film Festival in her specular beige see-through evening gown that hypnotized the paparazzi captivated by the glitz and razzmatazz of stardom.



Bollywood superstar Amitabh Bachchan and Baz Luhrmann's "The Great Gatsby" starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Carey Mulligan and Tobey Maguire Wednesday evening lifted the spirits of the opening ceremony of the 66th Cannes Film Festival in spite of the rainy day on the French Riviera.
They were joined on stage by Steven Spielberg and other members of the 2013 Jury of the Cannes Film Festival.







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Thursday, May 16, 2013

Nollywood Diva, Ibinabo Fiberesima



Ibinabo Fiberesima is one of the leading divas in Nollywood, also elected as the first female President of the Actors Guild of Nigeria.







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Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Nominees Announced for BET Awards 2013



"Anything Can Happen" As The Line-Up Of Talent And Nominees Are Announced For This Year's BET Awards '13


HOSTED BY BLOCKBUSTER MOVIE STAR AND COMEDIAN CHRIS TUCKER


Hip-Hop Artist Drake Takes Command with 12 Nominations while Kendrick Lamar and 2 Chainz Are Tied with 8 Nominations


An Unprecedented 10 Nominees Rival For The Coveted "Video of the Year Award"


Chris Brown and R. Kelly Confirmed As the First Performers For This Year's Awards Show


Legendary R&B Singer Charlie Wilson To Be Honored with the 2013 "Cadillac Lifetime Achievement Award"


LIVE from Nokia Theatre L.A. Live in Los Angeles Sunday, June 30, 2013 at 8:00 p.m. * ET/PT on BET Networks


The BET Experience at L.A. Live, a Three-Day Event Including Concerts, Comedy Shows, a Film Festival and a Fan Fest and Seminars, June 28-30, Culminates with the BET AWARDS '13

LOS ANGELES, May 14, 2013 /PRNewswire/ -- Earlier today, nominees were announced at the official BET Awards '13 press conference in Los Angeles, by BET's President of Music Programming and Specials, Stephen G. Hill ; this year's BET Awards '13 host, blockbuster movie star and comedian Chris Tucker ; R&B artist Chris Brown ; hip hop artist Kendrick Lamar; and singer and television personality Tamar Braxton .

(Logo: http://photos.prnewswire.com/prnh/20070716/BETNETWORKSLOGO )
Leading the pack of A-list nominees include, hip hop artist Drake, with an impressive 12 nominations including Best Male Hip Hop Artist and Video of the Year; close behind is breakthrough hip hop artist Kendrick Lamar and rapper 2 Chainz tied with 8 nominations; A$AP Rocky with 5 nominations; while Jay-Z, Justin Timberlake and Miguel face off with 4 nominations each in the categories of Best Collaboration, Coca-Cola Viewers' Choice Award and Video of the Year.

In what is sure to be a showdown of epic proportions, this year's Video of the Year Award has a phenomenal line-up of 10 nominees including Kanye West , Justin Timberlake , Drake, Kendrick Lamar, Rihanna, 2 Chainz, A$AP Rocky, Miguel and Macklemore & Ryan Lewis , all vying to get their hands on the sought-after trophy.

During the press conference, Chris Brown was exclusively announced as the first confirmed performer.  As an added bonus, R. Kelly is closing the BET Awards '13 and will head over to the Staples Center immediately after to open the BET Experience concert. In addition, a living legend, Charlie Wilson was announced as the recipient of the prestigious Cadillac Lifetime Achievement Award, to honor his four decades in the entertainment industry.

"This year's line-up of nominees and performers is reflective of the variety of fantastic talent that's rocking the world right now," says Stephen G. Hill, President of Music Programming and Specials. "We are especially excited as we move on up to the Nokia Theatre at LA Live. You know how we do. Big thangs shall indeed be poppin'. The BET Awards. Anything Can Happen…and most likely will."



The nominees for the BET Awards '13 include:
 
Best Female R&B/Pop Artist
Beyonce
Tamar Braxton
Alicia Keys
Rihanna
Elle Varner
Best Male R&B/Pop Artist
Chris Brown
Bruno Mars
Miguel
Justin Timberlake
Usher
Best Group
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
Mary Mary
Mindless Behavior
Slaughterhouse
The Throne (Kanye West & Jay-Z)
Best Collaboration
2 Chainz f/ Drake – No Lie
A$AP Rocky f/ Drake, 2 Chainz and Kendrick Lamar – Problems
French Montana f/ Rick Ross, Drake and Lil Wayne – Pop That
Kendrick Lamar f/ Drake – Poetic Justice
Justin Timberlake f/ Jay-Z – Suit & Tie
Kanye West f/ Big Sean, Pusha T and 2 Chainz – Mercy
Best Male Hip Hop Artist
2 Chainz
A$AP Rocky
Drake
Future
Kendrick Lamar
Best Female Hip Hop Artist
Azealia Banks
Eve
Nicki Minaj
Rasheeda
Rye Rye
Video of the Year
2 Chainz f/ Drake – No Lie
A$AP Rocky f/ Drake, 2 Chainz and Kendrick Lamar – Problems
Drake – Started From The Bottom
Drake f/ Lil Wayne – HYFR
Kendrick Lamar f/ Drake – Poetic Justice
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis f/ Wanz – Thrift Shop
Miguel – Adorn
Rihanna – Diamonds
Justin Timberlake f/ Jay-Z – Suit & Tie
Kanye West f/ Big Sean, Pusha T and 2 Chainz – Mercy
Video Director of the Year
A$AP Rocky & Sam Lecca
Benny Boom
Director X
Dre Films
Hype Williams
Best New Artist
Azealia Banks
Joey Bada$$
Kendrick Lamar
Trinidad Jame$
The Weeknd
Best Gospel Artist
Deitrick Haddon
Lecrae
Tamela Mann
Mary Mary
Marvin Sapp
Best Actress
Angela Bassett
Halle Berry
Taraji P. Henson
Gabrielle Union
Kerry Washington
Best Actor
Don Cheadle
Common
Jamie Foxx
Samuel L. Jackson
Denzel Washington
YoungStars Award
Gabrielle Douglas
Jacob Latimore
Keke Palmer
Jaden Smith
Quvenzhane Wallis
Best Movie
Beasts of the Southern Wild
Django Unchained
Something from Nothing: The Art of Rap
Sparkle
Think Like A Man
Subway Sportswoman of the Year
Gabrielle Douglas
Brittney Griner
Candace Parker
Serena Williams
Venus Williams
Subway Sportsman of the Year
Victor Cruz
Kevin Durant
Robert Griffin III
LeBron James
Ray Lewis
Coca-Cola Viewers' Choice Award
A$AP Rocky f/ Drake, 2 Chainz and Kendrick Lamar – Problems
Drake – Started From The Bottom
Kendrick Lamar – Swimming Pools (Drank)
Miguel – Adorn
Rihanna – Diamonds
Justin Timberlake f/ Jay-Z – Suit & Tie
Centric Award
Tamar Braxton – Love and War
Fantasia – Lose To Win
Miguel – Adorn
Nas – Daughters
Charlie WilsonMy Love Is All I Have
Best International Act: Africa
2Face Idibia (Nigeria)
Toya Delazy (South Africa)
Donald (South Africa)
Ice Prince (Nigeria)
R2Bees (Ghana)
Radio and Weasel (Uganda)
Best International Act: UK
Marsha Ambrosius
Estelle
Labrinth
Rita Ora
Emeli Sande
Wiley

This year for the first time, the general public can purchase tickets to the BET Awards with a BET Experience VIP Package, which also includes 3-day tickets to nightly concerts at the Staples Center.
For 12 years, BET Networks has drawn music's biggest talent to be part of the biggest night in music; the BET Awards.  This year, the activity and excitement expands with the first ever BET EXPERIENCE AT LA. LIVE!  This three-day festival filled with comedy, gospel and soulful music concerts, seminars, film screenings, "106 & PARK" tapings and so much more will build anticipation for the finest BET Awards show yet.

BET.com/BETAwards ( http://www.bet.com/shows/bet-awards.html ) is the official site for the BET Awards '13 and features content on nominees and award recipients. The microsite will feature exciting interactive consumer elements and include information for ticket purchase, events, schedules and registration.

BET Mobile will return on June 3 rd with the official BET AWARDS app on iPhone and Android devices with exclusive photo, video and interactive content.

Join the conversation on social media by following BET's multiple social media platforms, dedicated to the BET Awards:

Follow us on Twitter & Instagram : @BETAwards, Use hashtag: #BETAwards
On Facebook: facebook.com/TheBETAwards
On Tumblr: betawards.tumblr.com
*All times are ET/PT
The BET AWARDS '13 will premiere Sunday, June 30, 2013 at 8:00PM BST across BET's international platforms in the UK and Africa.

Stephen G. Hill, BET's President of Music Programming and Specials, Lynne Harris Taylor , BET's Vice President of Specials, will serve as Executive Producers for the BET AWARDS '13, in conjunction with Jesse Collins , CEO of Jesse Collins Entertainment.

About BET Awards:
Established in 2001, the BET AWARDS continues to be one of the most watched awards shows on cable television according to the Nielsen Company reaching an average of 7.5 million viewers annually. The franchise remains the #1 program in cable television history, among African-Americans. Each year, the BET AWARDS recognizes the distinguished achievements of artists, entertainers and athletes in a number of diverse categories, including film, sports and music.

About Jesse Collins Entertainment
Jesse Collins Entertainment is a full service film and television production company founded by entertainment industry veteran Jesse Collins.  Over the past decade, Collins, the company's CEO, has played an integral role in producing some of television's most memorable moments in the music entertainment arena.  Formerly Executive Producer/Executive Vice President of Cossette Productions, Collins has produced award winning television programming including the Grammy Awards, the BET Awards, BET Honors and BET's Rip the Runway and has worked with superstar talent such as Will Smith, Jay-Z, Rihanna, Kanye West, Mary J. Blige, Kid Rock, Lil Wayne and many more.

About BET Experience at L.A. LIVE:
The BET Experience at L.A. Live is an exciting weekend consisting of concerts from A-list talent at STAPLES Center, Nokia Theatre at L.A. LIVE and Club Nokia, the BET Film Festival, fan festival, live tapings of "106 & Park," The BET GRAMMY® Museum exhibit, Music Matter stage, BET Revealed seminars and the BET Awards.  For the first time ever, tickets to the BET Awards show are available to the public through VIP ticket packages.  For more information and to purchase tickets to the events, visit www.BETExperience.com.

About BET Networks
BET Networks, a subsidiary of Viacom Inc. (NASDAQ: VIA, VIAB), is the nation's leading provider of quality entertainment, music, news and public affairs television programming for the African-American audience. The primary BET channel reaches more than 90 million households and can be seen in the United States, Canada, the Caribbean, the United Kingdom and sub-Saharan Africa. BET is the dominant African-American consumer brand with a diverse group of business extensions: BET.com, a leading Internet destination for Black entertainment, music, culture, and news; CENTRIC, a 24-hour entertainment network targeting the 25- to 54-year-old African-American audience; BET Digital Networks - BET Gospel and BET Hip Hop, attractive alternatives for cutting-edge entertainment tastes; BET Home Entertainment, a collection of BET-branded offerings for the home environment including DVDs and video-on-demand; BET Event Productions, a full-scale event management and production company with festivals and live events spanning the globe; BET operates in the United Kingdom and oversees the extension of BET network programming for global distribution.
Follow us on Twitter @BET_PR and @BETAwards

SOURCE BET Networks
CONTACT: Marcy Polanco, BET Networks, Marcy.polanco@bet.net, 212.975.4048, or Zabrina Horton, BET Networks, Zabrina.horton@bet.net, 310.481.3737; or Simone Smalls / Danny Astoria, Simone Smalls PR, Inc., Simone@simonesmallspr.com / danny@simonesmallspr.com, 917.388.3890; or Michelle Huff / Kelley Jackson, Huff Events & PR, michelle@huffent.com / Kelley@huffent.com, 212.239.1732
Web Site: http://www.bet.com







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Tuesday, May 14, 2013

My Dear, May I Smell Your Vagina?



What’s Your Vagina Supposed to Smell Like?

Find out what influences your scent, what’s normal, what’s not—and how to keep your lady bits clean.

Read more: http://www.youbeauty.com/body-fitness/vagina-supposed-to-smell-like#ixzz2THh7Qoaa







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Monday, May 13, 2013

AdamAndEve.com Sexpert Dr. Kat Debuts "The 12 Minute Sex Solution" Book On Amazon



13 May 2013 16:22 Africa/Lagos

AdamAndEve.com Sexpert Dr. Kat Debuts "The 12 Minute Sex Solution" Book On Amazon

HILLSBOROUGH, N.C., May 13, 2013 /PRNewswire/ -- Sex... It's everyone's dirty little secret. Almost 90% of us will have issues with sex at some point in our lives. Yet we don't want to talk about it – especially with our partners. Why? Our culture doesn't approve. It has simply sucked all the fun out of sex. When it's discussed, it's either too sterile or too dirty.

(Logo: http://photos.prnewswire.com/prnh/20110223/LA51821LOGO)

At last, www.AdamAndEve .com's resident sexpert, Dr. Kat Van Kirk, shows how to embrace the fun and simplicity of sex with her new book, "The 12 Minute Sex Solution: A Realistic Guide to Married Sex" on Amazon.com.

This no holds barred self-help guide advises adults of all ages how to alter their views on sex and sexuality in a way to be more present during the act of lovemaking. Starting with a directive of intimacy four times the first week, and building on the very definition of sex, Dr. Kat instructs readers how to increase both physical and emotional intimacy in a positive, low-stress way.

"The 12 Minute Sex Solution: A Realistic Guide to Married Sex" came about through Dr. Van Kirk's work with thousands of couples. She noticed that if couples employed a few very easy and direct techniques that their sex lives would improve drastically in addition to their relationships growing stronger. Dr. Kat noticed that many couples were setting themselves up for failure when it came to sex.

"People ask me everyday what's the one thing they could do to improve their sex lives," says Dr. Kat. "'The 12 Minute Sex Solution' is my answer to this question. My intent was to write a sex guide for couples that really cut a lot of the esoteric mumbo jumbo that's out there. Most people don't have the time or inclination to follow through on a heavy-handed relationship program. I've written this book according to the needs of the thousands of peopled I have counseled over the years."

Dr. Kat is a Doctor in Human Sexuality with a Masters in Marriage, Family and Addictions Recovery Therapy. Her popular program, "Sex Chat with Dr. Kat" can be found on podcasts through iTunes or www.drkat.com. Order your copy of "The 12 Minute Sex Solution" today at http://www.amazon.com/Minute-Sex-Solution-Realistic-ebook/dp/B00BWBEPLG/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1366753183&sr=8-2&keywords=12+minute+sex+solution.

For more information about Adam & Eve, visit their website at http://www.adamandeve.com/news. For additional information on Adam & Eve, please contact Adam & Eve Director of Public Relations Katy Zvolerin at 919.644.8100 x 3121 or katy@adameve.com.

SOURCE Adam & Eve

Web Site: http://drkat.com









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Saturday, May 11, 2013

NOLLYWOOD MIRROR® Cinema Make Up Video



Cinema Secrets Cream Makeup

Long-wearing cream makeup goes on smoothly and provides full coverage with thin application, making it a solid base for intricate makeup designs. The richly hued (black) cream is specially formulated to cover skin latex appliances and foam prosthetics. Cinema Secrets Makeup Remover Oil is recommended for clean-up. Ingredients: Mineral Oil, Petrolium, Glyceryl Stearate, Lanolin, Ceresin, Bees Wax, Hexyl Laurate, Paraffin, Candelilla Wax, Carnauba, Oleth-10, Methylparaben, Triclosan, Titanium.



Click here to order Cinema Secrets Cream Makeup.
















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Friday, May 10, 2013

Sheryl Crow To Perform Pre-Race Concert for the 55th Annual Coke Zero 400



Nine-Time GRAMMY Winner Sheryl Crow to Perform Pre-Race Concert for the 55th Annual Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola





DAYTONA BEACH, Fla., May 09, 2013 /PRNewswire/ — Nine-time GRAMMY winner Sheryl Crow, whose long list of hits include “All I Wanna Do,” “Soak Up The Sun” and her latest single “Easy,” will perform a hour-long pre-race concert prior to the 55th annual Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race on Saturday, July 6 at Daytona International Speedway.
Through a special VIP Ticket Package, race fans can get unprecedented access to the 60-minute pre-race concert that will be staged on pit road in the tri-oval area of the “World Center of Racing.” With packages starting at $115, the VIP Ticket Package includes:
  • A reserved grandstand ticket for the Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola
  • Pre-Race/Sprint FANZONE access
  • Admission to the VIP viewing area in front of the stage for the pre-race concert by Crow.
VIP Ticket Packages can be purchased online by clicking here.
“Sheryl Crow is one of the biggest names in music industry and we’re excited to celebrate the Independence Day holiday weekend with her,” Daytona International Speedway President Joie Chitwood III said. “Sheryl’s exhilarating performance will serve as a perfect prelude for the stars of the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series to battle side-by-side for the checkered flag in the Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola.”
In addition to her nine Grammys, Crow has sold 35 million albums worldwide and earned three American Music Awards. Since the release of her seven-times Platinum, GRAMMY award-winning debut Tuesday Night Music Club, Sheryl Crow has performed duets with musical luminaries such as Sting and Mick Jagger, released seven studio albums (each charting Top 10, four of them platinum-plus), a quadruple-platinum greatest hits collection and a Christmas album.

She has also been nominated for an additional 27 GRAMMYs, her most recent for 2008’s critically acclaimed Detours. Crow launched her very own clothing line, Bootheel Trading Co., is a cancer survivor, has performed for President Obama and is a passionate supporter of a variety of environmental and health-related charities, including the NRDC, The Breast Cancer Research Foundation and The World Food Program.

The stars of NASCAR return to Daytona International Speedway on July 5-6. Tickets to the Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race and the Subway Firecracker 250 Powered By Coca-Cola NASCAR Nationwide Series race are available by calling 1-800-PITSHOP or online at www.daytonainternationalspeedway.com.

You can also catch the Coke Zero 400 Powered By Coca-Cola live from Daytona International Speedway on Saturday, July 6 at 6:30 p.m. ET on TNT.

Fans can follow NASCAR on Twitter (@NASCAR) and stay up to speed on the latest news by using hashtags #NASCAR and #COKEZERO400. Fans can also stay connected with Daytona International Speedway on Twitter, Facebook and Pinterest for the latest news all season long.

Daytona International Speedway * 1801 W. International Speedway Blvd. * Daytona Beach, Fla. 32114


Media Contact:

DIS Public Relations
386.681.6782







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Thursday, May 09, 2013

How To Fight Fair


Photo Credit: Parent Dish.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

How to Fight Fair, Part III

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."6 "Don't sin by letting anger gain control over you. Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil."7

Sixth, the next point in resolving conflict is: stick to the subject at hand. Oh boy, when people stuff their negative feelings and sit on their hurt and anger, look out! They will eventually either implode (turn their emotions inward and get sick), or explode. And it may be the "smallest" little thing that triggers the explosion, so beware. They may also go back to unresolved grievances from decades ago! To resolve conflicts, it is imperative to deal only with the issue at hand. Period! Other unresolved issues can and need to be discussed at a different time.

Seventh, give up the right to always be right. People who have a compulsion to always be right tend to be insecure and immature. Be willing to say, "I was wrong. I apologize." As the Apostle Paul points out, we are not only to speak the truth in love but also to grow up and mature in all areas of our Christian life.8 That includes humility and respect for others and their viewpoints.

Eighth, as the Bible also teaches, "If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge. Don't let the sun go down with you still angry—get over it quickly; for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil."9 That means we should resolve conflicts and angry feelings as quickly as possible. When we resolve to do this, the devil loses his foothold.

Ninth, speak softly. Most of us tend to raise our voices when we are upset. Research has shown that one effective way to handle yellers is to speak softly. This tends to make them lean forward and speak more softly so they can hear what you are saying. Yelling begets yelling! As Michel de Montaigne said, "He who establishes his argument by noise and command shows that his reason is weak." The Bible says, "A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels."10

Tenth, pray. Pray first about yourself. One of the most powerful prayers I ever learned to pray was when I was at wits' end in a seemingly never-ending conflict. In utter frustration I literally begged God to face me with the truth of what I was contributing to this seemingly impossible situation in which I found myself. Within two weeks I saw my hopeless co-dependency (even though I hadn't even heard of the word at the time).

Once I saw the reality of what I was contributing, I knew exactly what I could and needed to do in order to resolve my part in the conflict. I wish I had learned to pray this prayer years before—even in Sunday School. Had I done so, I could have saved myself years of needless pain and frustration.

Finally, pray together. When two people are willing to face the truth about themselves, accept responsibility for their part in the conflict, and pray accordingly, there are not too many conflicts that can't be resolved. Remember, "The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth."11

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, in every conflict situation in which I find myself please help me to see exactly what I am contributing—whether it be positive or negative—and always take responsibility for what I think, feel, say and do. And help me to learn to be Christ-like at all times and always speak the truth in love. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

6. Proverbs 15:1 (NIV).
7. Ephesians 4:26-27 (NLT).
8. Ephesians 4:15 (NASB).
9. Ephesians 4:26-27 (TLB)(NLT).
10. Proverbs 15:1 (TLB)(NLT).
11. Psalm 145:18 (NIV).

<:>< Wednesday, May 8, 2013 How to Fight Fair, Part II

"But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, 'And who is my neighbor?'"2

Author John Powell expressed this attitude poignantly when he said, "We defend our dishonesty [denying and not sharing our true feelings] on the grounds that it may hurt another person, and then, having rationalized our phoniness into nobility, we settle for superficial relationships."3

Fourth, in continuing our series on resolving conflict the fourth point is to use "I" messages. That is, instead of saying, "You make me mad," or "You really hurt my feelings," say words to this effect. "When you say (or do) things like thus and so, I feel hurt and/or angry, and I need to talk to you about it." This helps you take responsibility for your feelings and avoid blaming others. Many of us are like the lawyer in the Bible who, "wanting to justify himself, said to Jesus, 'And who is my neighbor?'"4 This was when Jesus told him that the greatest commandment was to love God and your neighbor as yourself.

Blaming others blocks resolution. As difficult as it may be, I need to admit that nobody hurts my feelings or makes me angry without my permission. As counselor Dr. Narramore puts it, "The other person is responsible for their action. We are responsible for our reaction!"

For instance, if I had a perfect self-concept—which I don't have—my feelings would rarely be hurt. What the other person said or did wouldn't upset me. But if I feel inferior or have low self-esteem, I will be easily wounded and/or angered. To the degree I overreact, however, that is always my problem. The other person has simply triggered my unresolved emotions.

Overreactions happen when unresolved issues or wounds from our past are triggered. The more I have resolved my issues from the past, the less I will overreact when negative things happen to me. This isn't to say that we won't ever get our feelings hurt or that we shouldn't feel angry at times, but we need to learn how to respond in the right manner … at the right time … in the right proportion to what has happened, not in proportion to our hypersensitivity.

Fifth, working with several hundred divorced people over the past decade or two, I have found that many divorcees primarily blame their former spouse for the failure of their marriage without taking a serious look at what they contributed. Conflicts can only be resolved when both parties acknowledge their contribution to the problem or misunderstanding. Yes, it is true that some people are belligerent, dogmatic, and abusive. Even the Bible implies that some people are impossible to get along with.5 But even then there is something we can do. It may be standing up for ourselves—that is, overcoming our overly passive or overly dependent, or super-sensitive style by saying to an angry, abusive person words to the effect that if they continue to treat you in this manner, you will have to distance yourself from them. And, if you make this statement, you need to stand by your words and do what you say you will do. And also assure this person that your door will always be open should they choose to stop being abusive. In these situations tough love is needed; for as long as we allow ourselves to be abused, we are a part of the problem. In every situation there is always some responsibility we can exercise.


Suggested prayer: "Dear God, in every conflict situation please help me to be non-defensive, quit playing the blame-game, and see how in any way I might be overreacting and use this as a motivation to grow and become a more loving, understanding and mature adult. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

2. Luke 10:29 (NIV).
3. John Powell, Why I Am Afraid to Tell You Who I Am, Argus Communications.
4. Luke 10:29 (NKJV).
5. Romans 12:18 (NIV).

<:>< Tuesday, May 7, 2013 How to Fight Fair, Part I

"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."1

I recall hearing the pastor of a large church, when celebrating his twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, declare that he and his wife had never had a conflict. I didn't believe him. Wherever there are two people, there will always be some conflict, misunderstanding, or difference of opinion at one time or another. About the only way to live without ever having a conflict is to live in isolation as a hermit, or have one partner become a doormat who chooses "peace at any price," but this is not conflict free. The conflict/s have just gone underground and hidden from view.

Handled creatively, conflicts and disagreements can lead to growth and increased mutual understanding. But to make differences of opinions productive, we need to learn to disagree agreeably, and to value the other person's perspective in the process. So how do we do this?

First, and foremost, listen…listen…listen—not only with our ears, but even more so with our hearts. We need to hear what other people are really saying—not just what we think they are saying. We need to listen to their feelings as well as their thoughts. Good communication and conflict resolution requires listening beneath the other person's words to their sometimes hidden emotions and unspoken needs or wishes.

Careful listening ensures that we won't distort what the other person is trying to say. This is necessary because we each tend to interpret messages through our own lenses. If we are extremely sensitive to criticism, for example, we may interpret our spouse's potentially helpful suggestion as a criticism. The more our seeing and hearing "lenses" are distorted by our personal unresolved problems, the more likely we are to twist the messages people are giving us to make them match our perception of reality.

Second, always strive to speak the truth in love. Remember that "grace and truth came by Jesus Christ."2 We, too, need to precede truth with grace; that is, to always give loving, gracious acceptance. Some of us are long at speaking the truth but short on listening and short on loving. Unless we speak from a point of sensitive caring, people will not feel safe enough to share openly with us. Consequently, they may hide their true feelings, or become angry or defensive. Unless both parties can share their thoughts—and more so their genuine feelings—there can be no resolution.

Third, we need to be aware of our own true thoughts and feelings. If we feel angry, for example, it will be important to acknowledge our anger. But we should also be aware of what feelings and thoughts lay beneath our anger. Anger, for example, often covers anxiety or fear. Instead of being aware of our fear, we get angry. That feels safer. Not acknowledging this only makes matters worse.

At other times we use anger to stop others from getting close to us because we fear intimacy. Equally destructive, we deny our feelings altogether and pretend to be something we are not. Each of these reactions prevents conflict resolution. Unresolved conflicts create resentment, and festering resentment destroys many relationships.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, whenever I am in a conflict situation, please give me a listening and understanding heart so I will always hear and give consideration to the others person's point of view, and not be deafened by my own need to defend myself nor blinded by my own self-interest. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Romans 12:18 (NIV).
2. John 1:17.







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Monday, May 06, 2013

Mariah Carey Launches New Single "#Beautiful" Featuring Miguel!!!



6 May 2013 12:00 Africa/Lagos

Mariah Carey Launches New Single "#Beautiful" Featuring Miguel!!!

LEAD TRACK FROM NEW ALBUM DUE THIS SUMMER ON ISLAND DEF JAM !
"#BEAUTIFUL" VIDEO PREMIERES ON AMERICAN IDOL MAY 8th !
MARIAH TO KICK OFF GOOD MORNING AMERICA SUMMER CONCERT SERIES LIVE FROM CENTRAL PARK, MAY 24th !


NEW YORK, May 6, 2013 /PRNewswire/ -- Multi-platinum global superstar Mariah Carey caps her season on FOX's American Idol with today's world­wide launch of her new single, "#Beautiful" featuring Miguel. "#Beautiful" was written and produced by Mariah and Miguel, and is the lead track from Mariah's much-anticipated new album, due for release this summer on Island Def Jam.

(Photo: http://photos.prnewswire.com/prnh/20130506/NY07654 )

Global liftoff of "#Beautiful" on radio and the Internet takes place today, May 6 th at 7:00 a.m. edt. "#Beautiful" is live on all streaming services and is available at iTunes now. http://smarturl.it/iBeautiful

On Wednesday night, May 8 th, American Idol will premiere the entire "#Beautiful" video, shot by noted director Joseph Kahn. Following American Idol, the video goes up on VEVO/YouTube and all video channels - BET's 106th & Park ("New Joint"), MTV, VH1 and FUSE.

As Mariah recently told Billboard, her new album 'has more raw ballads than people might expect,' and producers including Jermaine Dupri, Bryan-Michael Cox, Big Jim Wright, Hit-Boy, The-Dream, Mike Will, and Rodney Jerkins. The new album is the follow-up to her worldwide multi-million-selling Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel (released September 2009).








Mariah Carey is the best-selling female artist of all time with more than 200 million albums sold to date. She has a total of 223 #1 records across all Billboard singles, albums, sales, and airplay charts, dating back to her "Vision Of Love" debut, including 18 Billboard #1 Hot 100 singles (17 self-penned). With her distinct five-octave vocal range, prolific songwriting, and producing talent, Carey has defined the modern pop performance. As a singer/songwriter/ producer, she has been recognized with five GRAMMY® Awards, nine American Music Awards, Billboard's Artist of the Decade Award, the World Music Award for World's Best Selling Female Artist of the Millennium, and BMI's Icon Award for her outstanding achievements in songwriting, to name a few.

SOURCE Island Def Jam

CONTACT: Media, Laura Swanson, laura.swanson@umusic.com, 212-333-8533










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